FLOSSI SEES THE GILDED SELF-GAZER

A person who not only commissions but adores a gold bust of themselves is best described as a Gilded Self-Gazer — a rare but luminous specimen of homo vanitas.

Such an individual may be observed in their natural habitat:

• Admiring their reflection in the gleam of 24-karat cheekbones.

• Hosting candlelit unveilings of their own likeness for bemused dinner guests.

• Casually noting, “It doesn’t quite capture my aura, but it will do.”

They are part sculptor, part shrine-builder, part public relations department, and entirely convinced that their profile — preferably in gold — belongs alongside the Caesars, Napoleons, and action figures of history.